Saturday, April 23, 2011

My Creation

Amid all loneliness and silence that surrounds
Its you that I feel around
For though you are not with me today
your love haunts me all along.

This day long loneliness, though killing
has turned for me into an eternal bliss
For its only for those moments
That I can silently feel your presence that I so dearly miss.

These feelings might seem new to you
but for me these have become a life
This loneliness created by your void
has turned me into an heartless droid.

I loved you since the day we met
and all I got in return was betrayal
You might have thought it as a lie
but this love, I promise would never die.

I don’t complain of this loneliness
for this is the only gift of you that I have
But still love! Is thy heart so tough
that you defy all feelings.

Don’t you remember that once you too used to love me
or the promises we had made
Don’t you yearn for the time we spent together
or the castles we made.

Were those castles so weak to fall so suddenly
or our love, so profound it used to seem, was so shady
I accept there were mistakes
but couldn’t they have been repented.

I know you too long for me
That you also want us back again
So love! Why you still keep a rough heart
while both our souls live a life in pain.

Come forward and hold my hand
and again be mine
Lets get back together again
and fill our lives with a new sunshine.


P.S.- I couldn’t think of some apt title for this poem, So if you could suggest some, I would be grateful to you.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

I MISS YOU :'(

Now when I m leaving you
I feel so weirdly strange
Speculating what would happen
And how my life would change.

These thoughts might seem new to you
but for me they have become a trend
Coz since I have known you
you were always more than jus a friend

Many eras have passed since we last met
yet your memories seem to be so fresh
Even distant u seem so close
that I feel as if u were engraved in my flesh.

I remember the time we spent together
the time we spent chatting beside the window
Is the way I held u that would I miss
or is it the warmth of ur shadow

We don't realise how people miss each other
unless we ourselves miss someone so dear
Today when I see people with their close ones
I only know how much I wish u were here

I know people will think I have gone nuts
coz these feelings are not explainable by logic
But I know these feelings can bring u back
coz these are no less than magic

When I look at the birds in the sky
you don't know how much I feel to cry
Oh! how much I long to be with you
and like free birds we would fly.

A sense of nostalgia takes over me
O how much I wish to hug you
Now I don't think there is ne point guessing the last line
Which is surely 'I MISS YOU'.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Yearning to meet you

Years have passed since we last met
Making those promises we hoped would be kept
Of those happy times we spent together
Those ecstatic memories which will remain forever.

That lip talking and chit-passing during classes
Bunking classes to get away from masses
Watching movies was never so much fun
That hanging out in the winter sun.

O! how shall I tell you how much I miss those times
Those memories which get buried away as life hums its chimes
O! how shall I tell you how much I yearn to meet you
Yearning for those times when it would be just me and you.

I accept there had been mistakes
Mistakes which tore us apart
But you would too agree on the amount of energy it takes
To rip two loving souls to their very last.

I find lack of words in telling how much I miss you
Or expressing the limits to which I yearn to meet you
O love! Forget thy mistakes and forgive mine
And hope we are able to vanish this deep ravine.


Sunday, September 19, 2010

The Poem I Wrote For Cresendo

Title : When I entered my room all I saw was red

The incident i describe took place some years back

When the government administration had begun to slack

Happiness, love and brotherhood were lost somewhere

Just the news of riots and murders were everywhere

To discuss the remedies of these

People were invited to a five star hotel cheeze

We discussed many petty issues during the meet

While we were being served snacks, coke and meat

There the clocks ticked faster than we had ever dreamt

Still we couldn't come to a decision that really meant

Yearning for freedom from that surrounding gloom

I left the discussion and walked to a room

All i saw there was red

Be it the floor or the bedThe walls were painted bloody red

All this gave me an awkward feeling that someone had bled

To ease my mind I walked across the room

And as I did so I felt getting sucked in some gloom

As such thoughts continued to creep

I didn't realise when I was hunted down by sleep

In that sleep i had a dream

Which came with a faint gleam

In it a dwarf came

Horlicks was his name

He made me realise

The pain of the sufferers and empathise

But Oh! suddenly the dwarf disappeared

As he went i got scared

For he was followed by a man in cloak

So scary was he that my dream broke

Waking up from my dream

I felt like crying out in a scream

That the red around me signified my bleeding conscience

Which I had left somewhere in my journey to find out the mysteries of science

This incident left me unbiased

On my longing to help the sufferers of riots

That's all I want to say

To all my friends who love to live and play

I ask you to be selfless, loving and kind

And work for the betterment of mankind

Stand up to remove the evils that lead to riots and discrimination

For in that way you will be contributing for the development of your nation

Friday, August 20, 2010

Aditya Birla Scholarship Essay 2

Decisions are very crucial in one’s life. They can make or mar your future and have a deep impact on your life and on the lives of those surrounding you. So it is necessary that we have strong and well resolved decision making capability.

There have been uncountable instances in my life in which my determined decision making quality has proved to be an asset for me. I am a kind of person who rarely changes his decision once it has been made. But yes, before taking any decision, I fully consider the pros and cons of the situations and the
various options I have. I also weigh the doubts and suggestions of others before coming to a decision. This thoughtful decision making saves the time which people generally spend on reconsidering their decisions. I usually use this time in implementing my decision or doing some other creative work.

Thinking about instances where my thoughtful and firm decisions have proved themselves the best, the first instance which comes to my mind is a quite recent one. It was regarding the selection of branch in IIT. Bombay and Delhi have metro culture. The charm of the city and the feeling that a metro city would give you more exposure in the various walks of life attracts students to go to IIT Powai or IIT Delhi. I was also asked by my parents to fill up Bombay and Delhi as my first choices. But I was quite resolute to come to IIT Kanpur due to better quality of academics and research facilities it provides. They accepted my choice half‐heartedly. But when they came to Kanpur and themselves the saw structure and quality of education here, they felt that I had taken the right decision. From my side too, I feel the same. In IIT
Kanpur, the academics and research facilities are par excellence. Apart from academics there are many hobby clubs where students can learn and practice their hobbies. There are student bodies here which take assist the administration in taking many important decisions. This helps in the development of leadership qualities in them and gives them experience of various situations in life.

I had to make one more similar kind of decision about two years back when I was in the eleventh standard. I had to choose a subject in which I would continue my studies. Due to my passion in science, I chose the science stream. Now I had the choice of biology or mathematics. Although my parents had
given me full freedom of choice but there were many people who were expecting, or rather advising, me to take biology. They would say your parents are in the medical field, so you would surely do better in biology. This all continued even after I had opted for maths due to my fervor for programming and maths. But when the results were declared for JEE and other exams like KVPY, people finally realized that my decision was not wrong.

There are many more instances where this quality has helped me. Apart from the help it gives, this quality also increases my confidence when my decision goes correct. Also it makes me open to all kinds of situations I may face in future. It gives me a strong standing in situations where a quick decision is
needed. Decision making quality is an important one for a leader as it puts him in a strong position. So I think this consideration qualifies me to be a distinguished ‘Aditya Birla Scholar’.

Aditya Birla Scholarship Essay 1

It is rightly said that your background has a deep impact on you. As it happens with others, it happened with me. With my parents in medical field, interest in science was natural for me. It was my parents who shaped my interest in science. About 8 years back, one of my cousins who was preparing for AIPMT had come to Jodhpur for his studies. I have a nerve for reading books and his books provided me a great source for reading. Although I didn't understand what the topics meant, but still they were something to read. Eventually as I started understanding the topics, my interest started developing. It gave me an urge to explore more about the world and seek the explanation for the various phenomenons occurring around me.

When I was in third standard, I was introduced to the LOGO language as a part of my school curriculum. That language was a source of enjoyment for me. Watching the pointer move and make various figures at my command was fun. This fun eventually developed an interest in me and opened me to a new
world of computers and programming. As I was introduced to more programming languages like FoxPro, 'c' and C++, programming went on to become my passion and my favorite pastime.

I have a deep passion for science. When I had to make a choice of subject in eleventh standard, I chose to continue my studies in science field. So then I had to choose between mathematics and biology. I was keenly interested in programming and maths and wanted to do my graduation in computer science from one of the premier institutes of engineering, so I chose maths. Also I felt that I could reach more people, that is, I can give more benefits to mankind if I am in engineering field than if I am in medical field.

CSE department of IIT Kanpur is one of the best in the entire world. I always wanted to be a part of this department. So when I secured a rank in JEE with which I could make my dream come true, my first choice was this department which would teach me all what I always wanted to.

Now when I am a part of this department, I aspire to learn all those things related to programming and computers that I always wanted to. Besides regular academics, I want to make my concepts clear about various complex programming skills. I would also like to learn more about the network structure which links the computers all over the world. I want to learn about its design, its functioning and the ways in which it was programmed. I also aspire to learn the logics of programming and algorithm development.
I wish to learn more about operating systems and their functioning. I also want to learn high performance computing which includes the programming of super computers and parallel programming for research work which I yearn to do after passing out from here.

After doing this course, I want to go for an M Tech. and PhD. Degree in one of the best universities of the world. Then I plan to return to India and associate myself with some kind of research work with which I can do something for the betterment of mankind.

Monday, July 12, 2010

F.R.I.E.N.D.Z.


Days or maybe months might have passed since I made this blog, but it seemed uncomplete to me without any entry. I had gone over a hundred topics on which I could write, but none seemed to be enough engrossing to bind me to write even a hundred words on it. To be frank, I didn't have the courage to write on any of them coz they were pretty technical (that's typical of me) to be made as a blog entry and maybe also coz I m a lot lazy. So now when I finally mustered courage to write a blog entry, the first thought which came to my mind was to dedicate this to my dearest friend, a friend who has always supported me, guided me and told me when I did something wrong. So finally shutting this crap this post goes without saying to AASTHA BHANSALI.
Talking about her takes me 14 years back to my kindergarten when we first met. Now if u have known each other since last so many years, it makes a good probability that u become really good friends. But I don't feel to agree on the fact that we have known each other since such a long time. Rather we were, speaking crudely, totally unaware about other's existence till class eighth. Let alone the time when we used to try to find how much the other has scored after exams (that too indirectly and just for the sake of predicting our rank in class). I don't remember if we had ever talked before seventh standard, when we had our first talk. That was for some English contest or something when she was introduced to me by Manali. That time she seemed to be a haughty girl whose state of mind could change with every passing second (and that too unpredictably). Now who would like to do friendship with a girl like that?
But as time passed, I started realizing that I was wrong. That all happened all of a sudden in eighth standard when our class-teacher Thakkur ma'am made her sit with one of my coolest pals Abhishek just behind me. At first we both used to feel awkward talking to each other coz of many wrong ideas we had about each other's behavior.
But as it is rightly said that even if u leave the best enemies with each other (now obviously they don't have weapons and they are not allowed to indulge in a physical fight) for some time, even they would start talking to each other. Same happened with us. After a passage of time, we started talking and as we talked we realized that we had many things in common. We were much ahead of many of our peers in many things. We shared more interests than anybody can even think of.
At about the same time a cold war had started between Manali and me (ok she was my best friend at that time but she had started teasing me by Aastha's name which I opposed. This led to circumstances which created a rift between us. I didn't even say her a goodbye when she left for Bangalore). All this happened in such a small span of time that I didn't realize that I had developed a very close friendship with Aastha.
As days passed this bond deepened. We used to have loads of fights and laughters together. Trying to know about each other, discussing about life, doing handwriting analysis of various people and, not to forget, mocking Mr. I KNOW was really a fun. People had started thinking that we were a couple but it didn't really matter to us. We were much above all such relationships. We were (and are and will remain) more of a brother and sister.
Time passed and we enjoyed that great friendship. All went on until I had to leave for Kota after my tenth boards. She was, I could guess, very upset on the thought of losing me. But still I had to leave. She packed me a letter as a farewell gift (unfortunately I couldn't take that). We left each other with a promise that we will keep troubling each other ;)
Now when today I write this again, a sense of nostalgia takes over me. I yearn for the time we spent together, that fun and fights and everything. I miss those talks we had. *sigh*
Now again I have to bid her a goodbye, I will be leaving for Kanpur in a few days. I don't know when we would be able to talk again or see each other. Just want to thank u Aastha for accepting me the way I was, much far from perfect, interfering and indulging. Thanks for guiding me and supporting me even if I was wrong. Thanks for bearing me. Thanks for everything. I know that u will surely make it to NLS BANGALORE, will become an awesome writer and more importantly a very good human being. Just wanna say u that sis u gotta go places and get a lot of name and fame, but wherever u go please don't forget this brother of yours. May God give u all what u want from life :)